March 3, 2016
There may come a time in a dog’s life when he or she feels increasingly blasé about life, growing disillusioned with the domestic lifestyle. After all, there’s only so much entertainment and spiritual growth a dog can experience from anticipating his or her owner’s arrival from work, being told to perform tricks, being taken for walks in the same neighborhood day in and day out, and sleeping at night.
Dogs are even likely to become so bitter to the point of rebellion at some point, as the movie White God warned us, although that movie is more a warning about the negative karma that comes with animal cruelty. Still, if your dogs appear somewhat bored and unfulfilled with the life in your home, and stress or depression seems to mount with every passing day as they plop down on the floor and sigh or whimper with malaise, it may be time to send them to a retreat to help restore a sense of purpose in their lives.
There are many benefits that come with a canine retreat.
Sending Your Dog to a Tropical Canine Retreat
Start by telling your dogs that they’re going to a “special place for dogs,” but don’t make it sound too happy or they may simply think you’re trying to make a mundane trip to a doggy daycare place sound more fun than it is. Don’t explain too much, because you want to maintain the element of surprise. Try to convince them that this trip will be “different, more exciting,” but don’t give too much away.
When you take them to the airport and give them their boarding passes (simply stick them in their collar) and walk them to the gate, let them know before they board their flight that they’ll have a chance to be independent and have some time to themselves. They might find this refreshing, albeit mildly stressful. Assure them that this time they’ll be the alpha, and this may help restore some confidence. They may even make some fellow canine friends.
Once they board the flight to their retreat, taking a seat along with many other canines headed for paradise, they’ll be on their way to reap the benefits of a canine retreat.
Increased Spiritual Awareness
We don’t know what type of spiritual entity that canines worship. Maybe they worship us, their owners. They could even be predominantly agnostic or atheistic, for all we know, but in any case, sending them to a canine retreat can help them find their place in the world.
Many retreats have guides that will split dogs into groups of threes and assign them each a bamboo cabin in which they can freely sleep, eat, walk around, go to the bathroom, and meditate. They may not be inclined to meditate until the guide shows them how, as they’re likely unfamiliar with the very concept of meditation.
The assigned guide per group of dogs will show them to a spirit tent where they can each sit and observe a single pillar in front of them with a bronze canine head on top. By looking at this pillar, canines can peer into their inner selves and learn more about their identity beyond second-in-command to their owners. Again, we don’t really know if this works, but the canines appear to be happier. I know mine seem to be.
Following their time in the tent, they will be asked to return to their oasis cabins and meditate when they have the time, with detailed instructions.
Not only does meditation help canines find their spiritual center, but it also reduces stress in the long run. Canines can learn to relax through acupuncture, massages, mud baths, milk baths, facials, manicures, pedicures, aroma therapy, aura crystals, metronomic gongs (that ring thrice a day in sequences of 10 rings), alkaline water to improve their voltage, and more.
A view of the ocean is also a great way for your dog to alleviate stress, being able to sit and watch the waves fold and crash as the sun retreats and rises with each day. Nutritional juices will also be provided to improve chakras and other spiritual elements, further reducing stress.
My dog came back from his retreat looking perpetually stoned, and still looks as chill as ever. It’s nice.
One of the biggest changes I noticed when my dog returned from the Bermudan island retreat of Guadanango was the surge of confidence he expressed. He’s had a crush on this bitch across the street for months, but he would always tremble when in her presence. Upon his return, the next time he saw her he ran up to her, sniffed her behind, and promptly courted her. They have a great relationship now, and my neighbor and I might spring for a doghouse meant for two pretty soon so they can spend time together in there. We may even send them to a couples’ retreat or pay for a night at a nearby romantic getaway hotel such as The Champagne Lodge, although we’re not sure if they’d accept couples outside of the human realm.
All in all, sending your dog to a tropical canine retreat may give your canine the rejuvenation he or she needs to find life completely fulfilling.